Just Five By David Reid Otey

I spent too much time with the electronic waste land, again: Facebook (after the important parts of family and friend news), Yahoo news-getting tired of being sad and angry at what they present in negatives, and the sideline garbage and sales pitches. We’re too often infatuated with being fascinated, like the pirates opening every trunk they find hoping to finally gain great treasure and Nirvana.

But the deep interest/ talent side of my mind was consistently calling me, like the rotating beam of a light house,  to ”come play with us”. I heard another call from there, looked at the clock, sighed at another ”fallen” section of time passed, and then heard another voice attached, no doubt, to the talent side, that said, ” just do one minute of the self-defense exercise. Just one minute.” I did, and during that minute decided to do another and another for four minutes. I felt very good. So, I walked into the kitchen to shrink the sink full of dishes. This time, though, I said to myself, “do just five minutes, since it’s late.” I set the stop watch on my cell phone and placed it inside the open spatula drawer where I could see it and keep it dry. I thought of positive events of the day as I washed, and peeked at the timer after each glass or plate. Five minutes was almost up, but I felt like doing ” a few more” and continued. My thoughts took over the time watching and soon I noticed I was in the twenty minute range. I was close to a perfectly clean sink so I finished all of the dishes and then wiped the counter until 25 minutes appeared. Then I stopped.

I’ve done this before occasionally with regard to my music and journal writing. If I renew this practice as a daily keystone habit then I can dive into my talent projects quicker. It is difficult to avoid distractions when I think of my projects as needing a half hour to accomplish anything. Distractions, by nature, are “just for a minute” attractions to start with, and we all know how easily those minutes add up to an hour and more. So I can control those time slips by consciously and purposely setting ”Just One” or “Just Five” minutes to a talent project.

I already know the exponential power of any action taken on a consistent basis. I’ve experienced that often and it is a great feeling. Continuity is the next phase I need to master with regard to my talent projects. I’m getting there and with writing this I can help insure my commitment to the daily practice of “Just Five”.  Time to go now. END

How serious is this problem ? By David Reid Otey

We have a problem, or do we ?  Maybe it’s only an inconvenience magnified by the fact that we hate  to be stopped to give extra thought to just about anything. Maybe we expect life to go continuously smooth on the basis of  feeling we deserve it that way.

Intensity, frustration, concern, doubt, fear–all of this stuff is prime plot material in movies and television shows, and many of us give ourselves a constant diet of this mind frame. It must affect us in some ways that are unhealthy for us. We live in a consistently electronic world where even programmed peace on television is interrupted by commercials. We are often subtly conditioned to interrupt our own thoughts, to train ourselves to be distracted on a schedule, tired of anything and everything after fifteen minutes, ready to make excuses every half hour to avoid and escape from anyone or anything.

One remedy is to try controlling  everything. Controlling our time, our thoughts, our actions, our plans, our steps to our dreams, our moments of breathing, talking and walking is a great demand upon our minds, bodies and spiritual sense. Where is the “surprise” in life going to take place with such watchful eyes upon every second, every person, every sound and movement?

Being aware and present is the most necessary factor to having ”sane” control: the kind of control which means we can 95% of the time respond correctly, appropriately and quickly to any frustrating or dangerous situation. Response is the key to control. We can have thoughtful responses based upon ability to predict points of interruptions, from inside or outside of us. Choosing planned times to focus on the steps of what is most important in our lives maintains the frequent and steady consistency needed for progress.

Maybe a problem belongs to someone else, who wants that problem to also belong to us with equal concern, intensity and time involvement. Maybe we choose to include ourselves in someone else’s problem of their making, to be a hero. Every problem needs three basic elements: time to analyze causes and solutions (which can take 2-4 hours average), comfort from friends and family (which can take from 2-4 hours), and action/response (which is up to the person who must do that part).

The time we take to involve ourselves in other’s problems must be given a specific and reasonable time limit. The comforting element has a purpose of building hope and confidence for the person to be able to make the chosen response. Dragging on this part of the process leads to codependency and helplessness, and will take time away from our own life needs.

Maybe the problems are not even ours to personally worry about. Wars and atrocities in other countries should not worry us, if we do not live anywhere near them. We can empathize with their needs. We can pray for them to resolve and reconnect in peace. We can donate money to funds targeted for their reliefs. We can prepare for how those events might affect some elements of our lives in our own country. In cases of other places being devastated by storms, we can travel there to be part of comfort and clean up if that’s part of our personal life goals. The point here is to stay away from an “end of the world” worrisome mindset. “End of the world” scenarios and media hype have been around for eons. We do our best in this world by staying focused on where we are, on what we dream to do, and on the steps of those dream goals along with our necessary daily needs.  Don’t worry, be aware.  Don’t worry, be focused. Don’t worry, be happy.  🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WHERE AND HOW DO I FIT IN AROUND HERE ? BY DAVID REID OTEY

We have to be right about some things to feel qualified to exist. That is why frustration is so strong when we’re wrong. Belonging to life means belonging to other people. Most of that belonging is to “fit in”. We fit in with clothing style, hair style, language/lingo, body marks or lack of, tastes in food, literature, films, hang outs for social fellowship, points of view with a degree of individual differences allowed, as long as intelligent discussion can take place, AND with being recognized as “right” about ‘anything’ once in a while. It’s a praise to hear, “Well, yeah, you’re right about that.”, as a ‘just scraping by’ acceptance from a member of the group.

The ‘being right’ part is more important than the rest because it’s easy to change or excuse something about any of the other elements, but to NOT match in mental blend means one of two things: you really don’t belong in that group by nature of who you are–and therefore should get out and find the group you really do match with—OR you are labeled as the ‘joker’ card of the group—and that is a social death blow for continuous social contact because ‘invitations’ to special events will not reach the joker, thus being cut off, and that action will become common knowledge among others and will eventually lead to the ears of the joker who will then be depressed, etc. Bottom line, the joker card spot is never a permanent position for anyone. If the joker doesn’t leave by half-way intelligent free will, the group will make sure the door is closed with a subtle ‘shunning’. The subtle shunning is far worse than the “in your face” shunning. Direct insults are always better because you can yell back in their faces regardless of being wrong or right about it. At least you get the satisfaction of standing up to the ‘mean ones’. BUT subtle shunning is cruel and feels like a knife being slowly pushed in. NOT GOOD.

There is strong merit to this idea that we REALLY DO need to be right about a certain percentage of things in life, to feel that we have a right to exist at all. Belonging to people as a group is the purpose of existing, perhaps. This can explain the extreme inner spirit pain that so many feel to the point of committing suicide. They really feel that they do not belong, that they cannot be right about anything, or what they want to be right about. And maybe they do not want to belong to a different group.

Their (our) perspective of which groups are important is where the wiring might be a bit skewed, twisted, off set. We gain much of our “opinions” through conditioning of facts and fictions mixed. The conditioning comes from family and friends, each being led by traditions and beliefs from private or social cultures and the current community culture of ‘what’s cool today’ in connections to music, clothes, political viewpoint, hang outs, lingo, etc. The fact is, every group—good or bad, sane or crazy– has a following, a fan club, a history and, especially in these times, an outlet of connection and fellowship through internet, world connections for chat, hook ups, you name it, it’s all possible. SO, the pressure is on “being where you are”, fitting in where you see actual people walking around you. It doesn’t matter, in a sense, if you DO belong to some group NOT physically represented where you live. What matters most is belonging to people you can immediately touch, see eye to eye and talk personally to while looking in their eyes and feeling the energies from their presence directly. THAT’S the winning card. It’s the big gold ticket like Willy Wonka’s chocolate bar prize.

I just have to be right about all of this. 🙂 Why ? Because sanity is extremely important if you want to hang on long enough to see the proof that we all belong, we are all important and we all have someone who deeply loves us for who we are because we match their energies in some ways, some of the times and that’s all we really need to belong, to be right in the connection sense instead in the fact sense.

You already belong. The journey of life is to find where and then to recognize and accept when to change, as you grow inside toward other groups that provide what you need next for your spiritual journey. Eventually there will be some groups you always belong to. Relax and enjoy the journey and be brave and bold when you walk where you live. Be true to your sense of yourself, and if you cannot find the group that matches you, start your own. Then you will see them show up from their own hiding places because someone was brave enough to give them permission to be ok.

The end.

Covering up. By David Reid Otey 9-2014

Covering up can mean protection from the cold, from sunburn and  from rain. Covering up is needed to heal wounds, lower risks of infection. But the greatest use of covering up is often negative, destructive, debilitating and crippling. It’s good to be aware of which way we really are using the act of covering up. What we think may be protective will really have the opposite effect. Here is what I mean by this.

Cover it up.   Hide it.    Don’t let it be seen.   Don’t let it out.

Cover up hope with disbelief. Cover up love with self-centeredness.  Cover up healing with vengeance.

Cover up progress with lies.  Cover up grace with conceit.

Cover up  the scars, the bruises, the failures, the mis=steps.   Hide the blemishes, the signs of humanity, the signs of imperfection, of  cruelty, of awkwardness.

Cover the shame of need, of want, of  jealousy.

All that energy of covering up what everyone knows, what everyone does, what everyone thinks.

Forgiveness was made to uncover, to climb out from, to be free from the pains of shame and embarrassment.

Grace was made to have second and third chances, to begin again and again until the right path is found.

Redemption was made to balance justice, to provide new life in new thoughts, new actions, new hopes.

Covering up creates festering. Covering up creates loneliness. Covering up creates psychosis. Covering up  is slowly dying.

Life is open for growing through challenges and risks. Life is made to uncover ignorance and fear. Life is made to enjoy, to join in, to help create and to heal with and among each other.

Uncover your talents and dreams  and hopes. Connect and become what you are meant to be.

 

This Kind of Change. By David Otey

The mind is the number one control center. The programming starts from day one, coming out to join the world. For many years the brains of us have been soaking up understandings through what we’re told, what our senses bring in and what we think looks and feels good enough to give room to. We won’t know for a long time how much of our programmings are really mis-understandings.

We figure out what’s what, as we lose money, friends, time, respect, spouses, material possessions, an arm or a leg, any sort of loss that grabs us deep with the fact that we have reached a point of no return. We can’t go back, turn back the clock, get a fifteenth chance. It becomes the fork road, cross road and only one of them is open. And we already know, because we can feel it and even see some of it within sight on the only road open to us, that it’s going to be hard like we’ve never known. It’s time to change from what we were to what we must become, to not have to repeat the same losses all over again with the new acquirements. To hold onto the people and good that came from the right choices and understandings.

This kind of change is like trying to rub off ten years of rust with a fine. smooth cloth. Beliefs settled deep struggle to hold on like someone clutching to a cliff edge. The battle to change is slow and difficult. But it is possible and becomes successful because of the constant forward sight of  why we’re changing by our own will, and the difference we know it will make, the difference it already makes as we feel stronger, more confident and happier step by step. Like the marathon swimmer seeing the shore line, then feeling the sand beneath and finally trudging through the heavy steps in water onto the lighter steps on the beach to the joy of arriving totally on the land.  The little deeply felt rewards along the way are the extra energy bars to encourage and fuel the next step of the journey.

One defense used by old limiting beliefs and old enslaving thoughts, to fight to stay in our  minds, is to use defeating thoughts of shame, of time and our age being too late to change, of trying to convince us that we don’t really belong, that we’re just fooling ourselves, that others are laughing at our attempts to join a part and level of life meant only for others. These type of doubts are the small mountains to climb up and over, the potholes to climb up and out of, like the character in the book, The Pilgrims Progress. Life is meant for growth which means for changing into stronger and wiser spirits, to become greater givers and healers, more like flowers and less like weeds.

The anger and shame and fears in life are mostly the results of failed change attempts, of those being in too tight a bondage and to weak to look outward for the help of others reaching to grasp their hands and help pull them up and out of their despair. Convincing ourselves alone is almost impossible. We do need others. We need the help and words and hugs and encouragement of those already standing where we want to stand. Community has always been the strength of the strongest, the best, the wisest, the builders and maintainers of all that is right and good and happy and true.

If you’re on a journey of change right now, and you’re fighting the doubts that hammer away at your climbing successes, keep going, keep in constant communication with your helpers.  Focus consistently and act frequently every day toward the inner vision that you know is real and that you keep your  sight constantly upon. You’re closer now than yesterday. You’re never any steps backwards. If you learn anything from what you think is a slip, then you have succeeded with another step and you continue to succeed by continuing.  It’s the one life we get here on this beautiful world of possibilities and wonder. Keep on going. Keep on moving. Keep on holding the hands of those who love and encourage you.

KEYS By David R. Otey

Keys can be physical keys to push into locks, or groups of notes on a piano top. They are main points in a lecture or book, or a main speaker in a convention. “The keep point is…”, the speaker says, meaning the “one thing” that will get you blessed. Keys open the box of understanding. Key stones hold the arch together, pressure coming from both side,  meeting in the center, leaning from each side on a key stone which becomes the strongest stone-maybe. Keys are the dots of a dot to dot, the border pieces of a puzzle, the spices in a meal, the hooks of songs, the sight, sound, taste, smell or touch that inspires an idea or an action toward a major decision that sparks a major shift in one’s life. Trust is a key. Loyalty is a key. devotion is a key. Faith is a key. Hope, love, patience, honesty, one more chance–these are all keys. Keys open opportunities, connect to the next step of a forward journey, give light in dark moments, become landmarks of confidence and security. People are keys to each other. The key people in your life are dependable, forgiving to a reasonable degree and the greatest support group for your personal growth and survival in life.  For every dream there is a key to connect you. So keep dreaming and keep growing.

End

Two Ways–By David Reid Otey

DO or DON’T. That’s it. Two ways of aiming, driving, striving, shaping, forming, becoming, directing your life.

It’s NEED that determines which way we choose. The need to grow or the need to pretend and stay safe in a trained and limited way of thinking..

The need to belong or to pretend we’re not really ”those people” or people at all.

Security or Risk. To step close to see the edge and marvel at our height to feel encouraged we can go another step, or to stay far enough back to fall and not worry.

To put ourselves in others shoes to see life through their eyes, or believing we have the ”true” shoes and only we see  what’s right.

To join the group who shares the same talents and desires as support and connections, or to go it alone.

Judging ourselves for the lacks we are told we have makes it hard to climb over the mound of mental sludge and trash we have accepted over years.  We might sink to our knees enough times to just sit for good, thinking the view is always the same no matter where we slip next.

But if we keep walking, climbing and look closely, we will see the trash become more shallow and soon there is better footing and fast growth and more happiness for all.   Fall and rise, fall and get up again, trip and catch yourself and lift yourself up again. We don’t stop driving on a road just because of potholes and loose gravel and an occasional wreck or so. BUT that’s stuff that just happens  at times.

We can always fall back down to where we were, if we get tired of the great improvements that always come about from trying without stopping.

the end.