Perseverance By David R, Otey

I wrote a piece recently about the struggle to accomplish any dream. A friend of mine commented with one word: perseverance. I sat looking at that word, sort of stunned because that was NOT my point at all. Perseverance was not the same thing I was attempting to describe. I was not upset with the one word comment but it revealed to me that I missed the clear communication goal.

It is too easy to say to someone, “you simply must persevere, never give up, keep on going, no matter what befalls you, regardless the storms and tempests,…..”. To say that to anyone is giving a quick pseudo-shallow cheer leading phrase. It lacks the depth of HOW do you persevere. THAT’s the challenge. What does it take to overcome the deeply inset beliefs to stop, to quit, to hold off, to give up, to think too long about something before acting upon it.  Many people have been consistently leashed by comments from their family and relatives. As one phrase goes, sort of: a prophet has no honor in his own country. Dragged through consistent doubt in all phases of childhood, and seeing consistent examples of quitting, complaining and moving away to “greener pastures”  (until it’s time to mow the lawn) from family members solidifies and enhances a weak will power.

Time goes by though and the calling from that natural talent and desire begins to scream for existence, for a place and space in the tangible world, to be seen, felt, understood, accepted and included into the lives of others. If the weak willed person has enough intelligence and drive to connect to people of strong will who share the same dreams and goals, then the healing and strengthening of that will can happen.

Perseverance comes from a trained mindset, unless one is born extremely stubborn and perhaps extrmely self-centered to the point of making darn sure they get their way no matter what.  Perseverance requires believing you deserve what you want to have or to be. Perseverance requires a positive obsession of completing the steps of every plan as soon as possible. Perseverance, for many of us, must be introduced to our personalities, to our subconscious, to our inner belief system by someone else who knows how it all works. Whether by accident or providence, we must connect with that aura, spirit and faith of perseverance. Then we will be able to do it and bring the dream to the table of life.   End.

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Tearing it apart to confuse the kids. By David Reid Otey

I teach for a living. I’ve been at it for twenty years. I love it. I have an unusual special education class. I know I am fortunate. Throughout all these years I have been studying the process of education, of how we really learn the best, through personal  experience and repeated questions and possible answers from my own mind. The basic operation being used in most cases and most places, from what I see, no matter how the package is relabeled and redefined on paper, is an unfortunate simple process of breaking things down and presenting various modes of repetition for fact memory. In a best situation there will be the hands on projects where students actually create–not simply duplicate–to understand and have ownership of a process.

I tutored for two summers, meeting my two girl students in the local library. We each had to travel half an hour from opposite sides of the library’s town. I was determined that they receive more than just ”the same old same old” routine from their class rooms. I decided upon building their confidence in themselves first and foremost, to get that most important foundation built much stronger than it was. I knew their current math and reading challenges came from a weak beginning understanding of their own inner powers of learning. Each of their first tutoring sessions went like this.

I said, ” The first thing you need to know and believe is that you already have a ton of knowledge/information inside your brain. You are much smarter than you think you are. It shows in your eyes. Smart people can never hide their intelligence if someone can look in their eyes. You’ve seen people who you know are not very smart. You look in their eyes and you can even see their limits. But you have the look of a smart kid. So, you are smart. If it were possible to hook your brain up to a typing machine and to type a copy of everything you know right now, typing it all on both sides of each sheet of typing paper, and then stacking all of those papers neatly on the library floor, this library would be stuffed with those papers clear against all the walls and up against the ceilings and the doors such that no one would be able to get in. There would be no place to stand. No room for anything else at all.”  At this point they look around the room, look at me and smile, and sometimes say, “really?”.

I say, “Yes, and you already know the answers to 90% of what you are going to have in math next year, and probably in science and social studies and even in reading, if you happen to like to read.”  Then I explain what happens from the beginning.

When you are born your mind begins instantly to take in information of all kinds without judgement, without refusing any of it, without any resistance at all. You will no doubt complain about some things and cry at what hurts. Your spirit bonds with your mind and your body through this process of ”taking it all in”. Before you ever set foot in a school you have already had practical real life,  hands-on, creative, reflective experiences. You have observed, wondered, planned, experimented and discovered results and made new plans based on discoveries from the past attempts. You know land marks and how to get around your town. You know the architectural designs and differences of the homes of your family and friends and some of there buildings in town. You already understand elements of art and music and social skills. You understand psychology through interaction. You understand history by personal experience. You have experience in nutrition, in ethnic foods, in classifications of fruits, vegetables, grains, meats and dairy and other groups such as spices and herbs. You understand language, listening, reading, speaking and even some writing. It is really amazing what your mind has absorbed and experienced and acted upon in such a short time.

Then you walk into school where they tear it all part. All that knowledge you have is shown back to you in pieces, totally discombobulated, dislocated, shredded, mangled,  renamed, hidden from its connecting pieces that make sense of it all, suddenly becoming mysterious. Yet, after awhile, your brain tells you that you are familiar with this. There is something about it that you ”feel”. So you open your mouth and say what’s on your mind. The teacher, however, has a ”plan” to follow and your information cannot come out too soon. It might ”confuse” everyone else. So the teacher says, “Just hold that thought. We’ll be getting to that soon.” That means maybe by the end of the week or more likely not until next week.  Soon you feel dumb, stupid, and bored because, after all, your brain knows very well that this is old news being regurgitated. It’s also being forcefully applied by an unnatural formula unrelated to how the real world works. This begins your downfall. This is why you end up not even trying to ”get it” because you feel like you never had it and never will.  Now you are left with trying to survive with some speck of self-respect and self-confidence, to prove you belong somewhere important in the school. You have by then accepted the school’s definition of what a smart kid is and how a smart kid acts. You lose your own self-definition and give in to the status quo. The last thing I do is begin the process of showing them how to use the ”pieces” to bring in the whole of what they’ve known all along so that they can truly add knowledge without the torture of having to go backwards and redefine the meaning of what they’ve lived.

I have a neighbor who understands this idea very well. She home schools her boys and she makes them use ‘what they know, to figure out at least some part of what is needed to add on. When they do the process of discovery on their own instead of being shown every little piece, they like it better, learn more, remember more from creating with it. In short, she teaches them to teach themselves, to carry on the torch of never stopping improving their knowledge of themselves and the world.  End

 

WHERE AND HOW DO I FIT IN AROUND HERE ? BY DAVID REID OTEY

We have to be right about some things to feel qualified to exist. That is why frustration is so strong when we’re wrong. Belonging to life means belonging to other people. Most of that belonging is to “fit in”. We fit in with clothing style, hair style, language/lingo, body marks or lack of, tastes in food, literature, films, hang outs for social fellowship, points of view with a degree of individual differences allowed, as long as intelligent discussion can take place, AND with being recognized as “right” about ‘anything’ once in a while. It’s a praise to hear, “Well, yeah, you’re right about that.”, as a ‘just scraping by’ acceptance from a member of the group.

The ‘being right’ part is more important than the rest because it’s easy to change or excuse something about any of the other elements, but to NOT match in mental blend means one of two things: you really don’t belong in that group by nature of who you are–and therefore should get out and find the group you really do match with—OR you are labeled as the ‘joker’ card of the group—and that is a social death blow for continuous social contact because ‘invitations’ to special events will not reach the joker, thus being cut off, and that action will become common knowledge among others and will eventually lead to the ears of the joker who will then be depressed, etc. Bottom line, the joker card spot is never a permanent position for anyone. If the joker doesn’t leave by half-way intelligent free will, the group will make sure the door is closed with a subtle ‘shunning’. The subtle shunning is far worse than the “in your face” shunning. Direct insults are always better because you can yell back in their faces regardless of being wrong or right about it. At least you get the satisfaction of standing up to the ‘mean ones’. BUT subtle shunning is cruel and feels like a knife being slowly pushed in. NOT GOOD.

There is strong merit to this idea that we REALLY DO need to be right about a certain percentage of things in life, to feel that we have a right to exist at all. Belonging to people as a group is the purpose of existing, perhaps. This can explain the extreme inner spirit pain that so many feel to the point of committing suicide. They really feel that they do not belong, that they cannot be right about anything, or what they want to be right about. And maybe they do not want to belong to a different group.

Their (our) perspective of which groups are important is where the wiring might be a bit skewed, twisted, off set. We gain much of our “opinions” through conditioning of facts and fictions mixed. The conditioning comes from family and friends, each being led by traditions and beliefs from private or social cultures and the current community culture of ‘what’s cool today’ in connections to music, clothes, political viewpoint, hang outs, lingo, etc. The fact is, every group—good or bad, sane or crazy– has a following, a fan club, a history and, especially in these times, an outlet of connection and fellowship through internet, world connections for chat, hook ups, you name it, it’s all possible. SO, the pressure is on “being where you are”, fitting in where you see actual people walking around you. It doesn’t matter, in a sense, if you DO belong to some group NOT physically represented where you live. What matters most is belonging to people you can immediately touch, see eye to eye and talk personally to while looking in their eyes and feeling the energies from their presence directly. THAT’S the winning card. It’s the big gold ticket like Willy Wonka’s chocolate bar prize.

I just have to be right about all of this. 🙂 Why ? Because sanity is extremely important if you want to hang on long enough to see the proof that we all belong, we are all important and we all have someone who deeply loves us for who we are because we match their energies in some ways, some of the times and that’s all we really need to belong, to be right in the connection sense instead in the fact sense.

You already belong. The journey of life is to find where and then to recognize and accept when to change, as you grow inside toward other groups that provide what you need next for your spiritual journey. Eventually there will be some groups you always belong to. Relax and enjoy the journey and be brave and bold when you walk where you live. Be true to your sense of yourself, and if you cannot find the group that matches you, start your own. Then you will see them show up from their own hiding places because someone was brave enough to give them permission to be ok.

The end.

Kids are NOT Pill Boxes. By David Reid Otey

Kids are NOT Pill Boxes. By David Reid Otey

Pill boxes are nice for organizing the right pills for the right days and for the right times. This ensures having exactly what you need when you need it and in the right amount you need. There is no creativity involved in the process. It is cut and dry, simple as pie, easy as a straight line. Structure IS important for specific ultra sensitive issues such as medical needs and physical therapy and making healthy safe meals. Each of these areas have detailed task analysis, proven action-reaction relationships, undoubtable proven results from definite combinations of elements with very predictable expectations. BUT-kids are not THOSE kind of elements.

Kids are human beings. The variations of human beings cannot be simply classified by IQ, environment, heredity, neighborhood, county, state, country, continent nor economic status. The results of human reactions to thousands of variables have shown that one can always expect to be shocked and surprised at the predictable unpredictability of human beings. Senseless things can be of the upmost importance, like the songs, Red Solo Cup, and What does the Fox say. Humans shake their heads at each other, wondering if we as a species are going forwards or backwards, or maybe in consistent circles.

The attempts of government are to try really, really hard to force our species into some sort of straight line of great intellect and common sense, to save us from killing ourselves off or from making too many idiotic choices that could turn all of humanity upside down and drive us all back into caves. Standards have been the main chosen route to gauge the success of anything. Set a standard and make tests that match. Then make matching curriculums and the trio of success is certain. God bless the trinity of standards-test-curriculums. Great money maker, for sure. Great way to shake up a country into a state of confusion. While the public scrambles to deal with the pain and shell switch tactics being forced upon them, making them look the other way, government leaders associated with related businesses, who see the opportunities here, quickly make their moves for their own benefits.

I teach for a living. My occupation is steeped in absurdity. That means we are already working in a consistent fog. It is hard for us to see who is sneaking in to do us more harm than good. It’s never boring, that’s for certain. But it is very frustrating many times because the power we think we really have as teachers is only half as much as we are told. That’s ok, I guess. Because the real leaders of how things turn out are those little people sitting in the desks. You can try any trick you want. They all work for awhile, until the kids figure out the game—which their minds are always looking for–and then sabotage reigns.  Bandaid after bandaid, meaning standards after standards, cover a wound too deep to ever heal. I know this because I’ve watched the history of this nonsense. The government cannot apply the real medicine because of human unpredictability. Most of all the government cannot apply the medicine needed because it would mean losing their power, their hold over the districts monies, their demand to force education to be 99% College and University directed with no other equally viable alternatives. Absurdity Prime. Kind of like a game character isn’t it ?   End

My Disappearing Mom: Alzheimers joins the family.

Distance made it easier to see, but distance also made it more difficult to provide protection against the brain virus: Alzheimers.  When we talked on the phone between California and Illinois, mom’s conditioned mode of talking and subject content masked the silent steps of the mental intruder . Phone conversations had been a half-century practiced habit of my mom, because many of her friendships were maintained by phone as she constantly moved across the country.

I would ask mom something specific whenever my mind gave me tiny cues of something amiss, but she always successfully redefined and redirected me away from the suspicion.  Until one day, when there was no chance of redefining what she asked me directly. Her parents, my grandparents, had passed on over twenty years previously, yet she asked me two main things: “Have you heard from the Reids lately ?” and ” Isn’t that weird that I’m thinking of them ?”  And that’s the moment I dropped the ball big time because of fear. I was afraid to tell my mom she was “losing it” over the phone. So I lied to her by saying the Reids were on their annual vacation in the northeast part of the country and they’d  probably be back soon. I could not pull back from the lie once I spoke it. To me, I was buying time for help from her friend of thirty years who lived within fifteen minutes from her.

There is a strange defense of the human mind when this disease strikes. It is a connection between the mind and the spirit, almost as if the mind is the spirit–or the main housing of the spirit–contrary to how we usually express spirit by pointing to our hearts. I say this because of my mom’s severe negative reactions and harsh cursing language to her dear friend’s attempts to help her reorganize her life with a calendar and helpful tips. The denial that anything is wrong with one’s mind is ultra protective. The fight is stronger than giving up the car keys because the time has come. Freedom and self-respect are at risk now. If I cannot be me as I recognize myself then I cannot know anything for certain. That is the fear, the conditioned truth–maybe the real truth. Order is shaped by structure which gives us holding points like handle bars, to get around easier by the connections made in our minds.

Everything MUST connect somehow–as a like or dislike–with a connecting history we can explain in time and space sequence. Alzheimers totally shuffles the sequences of time and space or place, even sounds and sights. It is an amazing  disease in how it takes over and remakes a person on the inside. BUT it’s NOT like a personality-changing effect which I’ve heard happens often to people who suffer from severe head concussions or super hard hits to the brain. My mom’s hand gestures–all of her body language–and all of her usual vocal expressions never changed. That’s one of the things that make this disease so damned frustrating to the families. They see the usual actions and reactions and hear the same voice tones but cannot understand why mom or dad are not making any sense. This element took me almost half a year to pick up on. One afternoon, in the middle of talking, mom quickly leaned forward, frowned, put her finger to her lips and loudly said ”shhhh”, like telling a child to stop talking. She leaned her head to one side and said in a whisper, “Someone’s in the garage. Hear that ?”  I reacted in sync, frowning, titling my head, squinting my eyes, and looking the same direction as her for ten seconds. Then I nodded, sighed, straightened up and said, “It’s ok now, they’re gone, mom.” How do you know?”, she said. ” I just heard them leave and close the door.” She relaxed and became ok again.

As part of releiving stress for families, I tell them to make a little test.  The next time they visit mom or dad, to figure how advanced the disease is, call your mom and dad by their first names instead of saying ”hi, mom”.  Most people still say hi, mom, etc. I believe that your mom or dad will say something to you about it if they are ok, and that they won’t even flinch if the disease has become deeper entrenched. The value of this is two-fold. One, accept them in their state, because they remain the same people with the same memories although shuffled or lost in the back room so to speak. Two, the most valuable of all, you now have a chance to listen to some of their history and dreams and hopes never before heard which they tell only to strangers. This was true in my mom’s case. The hospice lady would call me to verify some of the stories my mom told but also to tell me things I never knew. My mom wanted to be a dancer. She told this to the lady with emotion. I wish I had done this little test myself.

Besides shuffling all of the life experience pages in our minds, mixing the dates and times and places like cut-outs and re-glues to other pages, this disease creates conscious illusions like living your sleep dreams in real time. This disease also takes memories from past dates and places and holograms them into the current time and place which makes for some strange scenarios. I finally got to the point of never asking mom how she was nor what she thought and never did I ask what she did for the day. I simply commented on the weather and started telling her what I did for the day. She would always have something to say or add, whether or not it made sense to me. Conversations became speaking drills of verbal collage or something that would resemble a Picasso painting.

In our case, flying to California to bring mom back to Illinois, we were fortunate for a simple accident that made her stay out of our way for the packing of her things for the trip. We transferred her from the hospital to our hotel room where she stayed the three days we had for our mission.  She had fallen the night before and could not stand up. We reached a neighbor of hers and he discovered her condition which prompted us to ask him to call for an ambulance. We had only three days to work everything around. This required a lot of giving away of furniture and some clothes to neighbors in the gated community. I told them mom always preached giving to the poor, which everyone was in the apartment community. Yet, one day, my son said he felt it was wrong doing what we did. “I don’t feel right about this, dad”, he said. I explained that while the disease tore everything up within her mind, it also required us, in our circumstances and situation–time constraint, long distance travel and limited finances–to tear apart much of the physical belongings she accumulated over the past forty years. When we settled into the van of her friend, who was able to get mom’s ok to drive us to the airport, mom looked out the front window and said, ” This is a lovely place, Don. What’s the name of it ?” He had to compose himself a few seconds before answering, ” Sacramento.” It was only at THAT point I realized mom thought she was in a completely different city upon entering our hotel from the hospital. She never knew she was only three blocks away from her apartment.

My mom’s mind had such a strong dedication to surviving that I believe her mind/spirit was able to create deceptions to those outside of her or far away from her for more than a year.  Some of this deception was consciously created but half of it was the mind taking over, as crazy as that may sound. I think this because of the third night she was in the health care center. I came to visit. She was asleep. I sat by her bed watching her sleep and I suddenly realized she looked very different: pale, suddenly older by a decade, totally worn out. I thought she was going to die that night or that week. I was stunned and saddened. I returned two days later and her disposition was a bit more calmed, and her face and color had changed again to more normal appearance. So I wondered if I had witnessed the brain finally letting go of its protection mode because of the fact she was now in a very protective and happy environment with other people and care takers. I am always going to believe that is what I saw.

Perceptions make happiness and sadness, success and failure, love and hate, marriage and divorce. Perceptions are mentally created yet emotionally supported. Your MIND is the BIG deal of your conscious existence. Alzheimers attacks the perceptions department. Memories are the structure and scaffolding of beliefs and thoughts and life experience interpretations. Altered reality from this disease is much like the M. C. Escher lithograph ‘Relativity’–all those impossible staircases. The experience seems like being possessed by another’s interpretation of your life experiences. Someone shook up the slide show and placed every period of life in random order and some of those went in upside down or sideways.

So, what to do about all this ? Nothing. Keep up to date with new possible meds yet with close scrutiny of the side effects–which can be worse than the disease. Make no expectations or demands of your loved one who is affected. You never know when the reality shifts will take place. There is no schedule. Realize that some of the victims feel great frustration. Help make life easier, happier in every way possible. the greatest expectation should be from yourself to give the gift of  keeping life simple and as joyous as possible. You can handle every bit of it if you’re committed.

My mom lived almost one year more when we brought her to our town. She was happy to have others to relate to. I was overjoyed at the care she received from the healthcare staff and the hospice lady. I can say I did bring her to the best life she could have had for her last year. When she passed on I imagined her traveling back to the time of a photograph I have where she and my dad and two friends are toasting each other in bathing suit clothing on board a cabin cruiser on some lake. They were college grads and just starting their new graduate lives.           The End, as far as I know.

 

Two Ways–By David Reid Otey

DO or DON’T. That’s it. Two ways of aiming, driving, striving, shaping, forming, becoming, directing your life.

It’s NEED that determines which way we choose. The need to grow or the need to pretend and stay safe in a trained and limited way of thinking..

The need to belong or to pretend we’re not really ”those people” or people at all.

Security or Risk. To step close to see the edge and marvel at our height to feel encouraged we can go another step, or to stay far enough back to fall and not worry.

To put ourselves in others shoes to see life through their eyes, or believing we have the ”true” shoes and only we see  what’s right.

To join the group who shares the same talents and desires as support and connections, or to go it alone.

Judging ourselves for the lacks we are told we have makes it hard to climb over the mound of mental sludge and trash we have accepted over years.  We might sink to our knees enough times to just sit for good, thinking the view is always the same no matter where we slip next.

But if we keep walking, climbing and look closely, we will see the trash become more shallow and soon there is better footing and fast growth and more happiness for all.   Fall and rise, fall and get up again, trip and catch yourself and lift yourself up again. We don’t stop driving on a road just because of potholes and loose gravel and an occasional wreck or so. BUT that’s stuff that just happens  at times.

We can always fall back down to where we were, if we get tired of the great improvements that always come about from trying without stopping.

the end.

Rub Down–A view of life actions. By David Reid Otey

One  summer afternoon I stood  washing cups, dishes, pots, pans, silverware and glasses, looking out the  window at the sunny, warm day, watching robins, finches, wind blown grass and waving tree branches. I smiled and had a thought-attack.  It started with a simple question: What am I really doing ? I was rubbing a soaped sponge inside, outside and along side each item in the sink. I use very hot running water, inspecting every speck of grime, food, spit, grease and stain to be erased with the help of  over head lights and  window light until satisfied it is disease-free, maintaining health for my family,  assuring everyone they sure won’t get sick from dishes I clean, that I care for their well being.

Then I thought, ” If this is such a noble thing I’m doing,  why have I  often felt like it’s a drudgery, like an insult to my station in life, an act that  made me feel angry at others: those who made more dirty dishes than me that I have to clean. Why do people argue about whose turn it is to wash ?   Why have I  rushed through washing a bowl and get mad when a piece of food is stuck to that bowl so that  I attack it,  splashing water all over everything,  frustrated that I can’t clean the bowl in  ten seconds, as though it were a state standard to prove intelligence.

I  realized that it really is sort of  a “beneath me” attitude that most of us respond with toward washing dishes,  cleaning the toilet, scooping the cat litter  box, lifting dog dumpings on a walk–not the stuff  people of class and wealth perform, but hire other people to do. Therefore, we do not like being our own hired help, so to speak. It’s a clash of self-image expectations. It came from conditioning, simply following the role models we had in our families: mom and dad, and even friends.

So, now, I wanted to change my mental perspective of this type of work to something positive. If I look at only the physical action of what I’m doing, apart from all of the ”added” perspectives, what I see is simply giving the items a ”rub down”.  It’s like a massage where you have someone rub down your central nervous system, rubbing out stress, bringing back the happy wonderful feeling of calm and peace. That human touch of healing, of giving, of sharing and caring for your emotional, spiritual, physical welfare.  Everything I do, everything I touch and everything I say has an effect, a result upon something or someone both directly and indirectly, especially upon myself.

The boy, Alladin,  rubbed a lamp to  make it shine,  and a Genie flowed out in a smokey cloud to take a solid form and tell the boy he could be granted three wishes. His action created an effect, an opportunity, an improvement, a hope.  Effort creates an opening to an unexpected opportunity.  Practicing guitar playing, for example, is an action of consistently rubbing the strings in patterns for melody and rhythm. The more frequently you do this, the more understanding, clear tones and perfect sound and timing you will gain, and that could lead to opportunities of making money through teaching and being in a band. Maybe it’s a crazy way to say it and see it. Rubbing the brain with thoughts and ideas from class room text books or from novels and newspapers. Rubbing the eyes with visions of colors and shapes and all sorts of art styles. Rubbing ears with speeches of great motivation, with stories of people who came through the toughest of times in life–such as incredible stories on the TED site.

If something or someone bothers us, they have rubbed us the wrong way. We can recognize that and straighten it out, somehow gaining an understanding as a rub down of sorts to bring ourselves back into alignment with peace and energy for the next step on the life journey.  There are far too many conditioned “downers” we switch our minds into playing out and shaping our days into a high percentage of depression. I think now of some of the news we see and hear daily. Why should I let a stranger’s life in the news affect me on the low depressing side of life. ? I can have an opinion without making myself sick or angry about whatever they did. I can pray for those who will be on the jury, for the lawyers, for the doctors, for everyone else directly involved in the decision making part of that story for that person. Some in my family let news rub them the wrong way. A famous person gets acquitted. They yell at the television. Sure, I agree it’s wrong in my opinion and according to my beliefs. But I’m not there. I have nothing to do with it. I cannot make a difference in that stranger’s life. So, I’ll rub all of my physical, emotional and spiritual energies onto and with the people and work I can affect where I live, where I am directly affected by those who share their energies with me. I’ll spend my time trying to make my home, town, city, wide spread area stronger, happier, safer, more productive. I think now that I really cannot afford to waste my time on unrelated lives and events elsewhere when I can easily do thinking and planning for where I am and toward what I want to do and become.

I rub away the dirt and grime off the plates with a tool that cleans. I rub away the weeds from my thoughts with tools that clear: great speeches, great stories, encouraging life coaches, volunteering, creating and planning times with family for fun things at fun places to empower dreaming and hopes that make a positive difference for all lives.     The End for now.